Hey hey hey this is Drago Felagund here talking to you. So you may be familiar with the situation when you meet a friend or an acquaintance while walking and you just say “Hey Mark! Good Day!” and walk off. But there are some situations when you know you gotta give the guy a hi5 or a fist bump or a hi-fist bump(that’s a thing). But you don’t know what to give! So as to avoid such awkward social situations for you and you and yes, specially you, I’ve formulated the most Epic-Meeting-Gesture-ever-for-meeting-that- friend-on-the-road(what fucking things I do for you. This is my life now). Use it and enter the Hall of 5! These are the steps you MUST follow : –
- Slowly ruffle the other person’s hair.
- Look at him/her in the eye and proceed to slap them 4 times continuously on a cheek, all the while snapping your fingers of the other hand.
- Tell them to do the same at the same time as you are doing it.
- After the good old slap-snap combo, punch them with both fists in the chest.
- Tell them to do the same simultaneously.
- Slap their ass twice, with them doing the same thing.
- Bump your head once, because then you’ll just get a bloody headache.
- Finally, give them standard hi5 to top it all off!
There! You have now perfected the way to avoid awkward social eye contacts and weird fist bumps that don’t even meet properly. Follow it exactly word to word and you have the best fucking meeting ever. Go ahead and live the dream life, my homies!